commentary2

1/17/05: TIME TO MOVE ON...

To Forgottenblog Three! Though, like Mr. Ed, I only speak when I have something to say.

12/25/04: MERRY CHRISTMAS....

and a creche on every Post Office lawn!

I joined an organization called photoblogs.org in November, just to see how popular I was. Turns out I'm not, because I was just listed on just two "favorites." What's wrong with this picture? I have over 2 million hits! (OK, a million of them is me) but still.

It's gotta be some kind of popularity contest! This site called chromasia is #1. It's one of those photoblogs with one image per page. Hey, I give you up to 25! Sometimes more!

Ahhhh, whadda they know...

12/16/04: BROTHER, CAN YOU SPARE A...

I was laid off from Macy's in November. It was a situation where each had lost confidence in the other's competence.

12/16/04: WHAT THEY WANT TO BAN

Don't believe the hoo-hah about the MTA valiantly taking a stand against terrorism in instituting a photo ban. It's about protecting intellectual property. It's about trying to stop distribution of photos depicting how shitty some of their stations are. It's about stopping distribution of pictures that aren't making them any money. It's about the assertion of power.

F!ck you, Peter Kalikow, f!ck you, Ray Kelly, and f!ck you, Bloomberg, if you pay lip service for photo rights but do nothing.

(LEFT) they don't want you to see this.

12/06/04: ZEKE'S ROAST BEEF MAY BE GONE

I went by Thursday at 3PM and found it closed, and I called them Saturday night at 8, when you might expect them to be open, and nobody picked up.

When I was last in 3 weeks ago, the place seemed to be under new Asian management, nothing new for Sunset Park. Perhaps they just want to renovate it, or perhaps it's gone.

Between '82 and '90 when I lived on 73rd St I was there once a week WITHOUT exception. If it's closed, one more icon of my youth, disappeared without comment.

I am a person of habit. I have dined at the McD's across the street from the Bayside Times every Tues. night without exception for the last 8 years. At PCH I was at Burger King for lunch every Wednesday. I'm the Cal Ripken of fast food, the Bret Favre of junk.

And in other news, we broke our snowstorm streak. On December 5, 2003 and 2004, we had blizzards each year. Also on December 5th, 2004 my boss at Macy's screeched, "WE ARE NOT FRIENDS!" We weren't. I accompanied my father to the ER at the hospital when he was compalining of stomach problems December 5, 2003. He was gone after 6 months. I'm glad it ain't December 5 any more.

11/25/04: SOME PEOPLE SIMPLY SHOULDN'T BE ALLOWED OUT-OF-DOORS

Joe DeSalazar of foodienyc.com and I have been having quite the debate in Gothamist:

How come all gourmet dishes presented by famous chefs feature a little bit of food plopped in the center of a very big plate?

www.forgotten-ny.com

Posted by: Kevin Walsh at November 24, 2004 01:08 AM

because it looks better than a lot of food plopped onto a small plate.

Posted by: joe at November 24, 2004 08:56 AM

Yeah, but I get the feeling that if I ever ate one of these designer dishes, I'd have a lot of room left.

I measure my gastronomic experience by how satisfied I am after leaving the table.

www.forgotten-ny.com

Posted by: Kevin Walsh at November 24, 2004 11:08 AM

unfortunately, that's why we are the super sized nation that we are. thankfully, satisfaction by many others is not only viewed how much they can eat at once, but the quality of their food.

Posted by: joe at November 24, 2004 11:33 AM

I'm not into an aesthetic or artistic experience when eating. I will not eat raw fish arranged into pictograms for lunch, or, for that matter, raw fish at all.

I prefer the Mohegan, with extra bacon, at the Cheyenne.

www.forgotten-ny.com

11/4/04: THE NEW NYC LAMPPOST?

The City Lights competition is over, and a new lamppost design has been selected. It will most likely appear on some NYC streets by mid-decade. Until Nov. 7th, the winning design and the two runner-ups were on display in full-length mockups at the Museum of the City of New York, and all submissions were also exhibited. The winning design, by Thomas Phifer and Partners, is shown on the left in the above photo; Skidmore, Owings & Merrill's second-place entry is in the center, and the partially-obscured third place design, by Atelier Imrey Culbert is on the right.

My own verdict? I looked at all the design précis and I'm disappointed to say that none of them grabbed me at all. They were all soulless, corporate, modular, personality-free lights, most of them T-shaped, others shaped like eels. Many of them incorporated street signs and stoplights in their shafts, making them completely streamlined. They were all functional but without charm.

The designs boasted that they uncluttered the streetscape. Clutter is part of the charm of the NYC streetscape. I'm grabbed by the visual image of a 1910s-era castiron post, or even a 1950s octagonal post, jammed to the gills with stuff: no-parking signs, one-way signs, stoplights, don't walk signals, street signs, curb your dog signs, plastered with stickers, festooned with graffiti.

All the designs were silver colored and stainless steel, making them completely at odds with NYC's still-vibrant stock of 19th Century architecture. They are a stark contrast, unlike the cast-iron posts, with their delicate metalwork and many different varieties, which perfectly complemented the architecture. The new designs may complement new architecture, but NYC has kept many of the older buildings. Will the bishop crooks be swept away by these new monstrosities?

All the City Lights designs presented lamppost designs that might work well in a midwestern city, but don't have the color or personality that NYC demands. Many dispensed with luminaires altogether. Lamppost luminaires, in their shapes and varieties, add distinction and variation to the streetscape. These designs do nothing but add coldness and sameness.

10/24/04: A NEW WAR IS NECESSARY



It's coming back. When the MTA claims to have graffiti-free cars, don't believe it. Apparently the policy of not allowing a car to leave the yard with a tag on it has gone the way of the 1.50 fare. If you want the graffiti comeback to be checked, contact your local elected official and get them to put pressure on the MTA to start cleaning the cars again. You know the vandals will not rest. Get the MTA off its rear end. Or subways will look like this again...

9/12/04: THE STARE

There are ways to keep people from occupying the aisle seat in a LIRR car in the three-seater when you have the window seat. Who needs to be climbing over people or waiting for them to get up when you ask them to? You're in a hurry, and you need to sit by yourself so getting out can be done with efficiency.

One way is to place your wet umbrella on the aisle seat when it's pouring, but it doesn't pour every day.

The other way is to fix a keen glare through your sunglasses at anyone coming down the aisle and entering your space, as in "don't even think about it."

Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. It doesn't often work when the LIRR runs 8-car units during rush hour, which is their wont lately.

9/3/04: SINCE I HAVE NOTHING TO SAY I'LL LET SOMEONE ELSE DO IT

Today is Dawn's birthday and in her daily essay, she expounds on 60s pop music, an area where we are always in 101% agreement. Visit her blog anyway because she is using this allusion to make a larger point.

>>>>[I] fell in love with Sixties pop at the same time that I first became seriously depressed, when I was 16. Although my dark years saw me give repeated play to some of rock's most notorious "downer" albums and songs—Neil Young's Tonight's the Night, Phil Ochs's "No More Songs," Big Star Third—for some reason, I kept coming back to the sunshine pop of the Left Banke, Herman's Hermits, the Association, the Kinks' Village Green Preservation Society, and Tommy Roe.

But it wasn't just the happiness of the songs that grabbed me, otherwise I would have fallen for modern-day artists. What I really adored about songs like the Cowsills' "The Rain, the Park, and Other Things" or Gary Lewis & The Playboys' "She's Just My Style" was the fact that the artists took a supremely limited form and stuffed it full of ear candy.

Today, a hit record can be six minutes or longer; it can be made by just one person playing all the instruments in a home studio; in fact, it can be made without instruments at all—just with sound samples. Compare that with 1965, when songs had to be three minutes long, studios required bulky equipment, it was technologically impossible for one person to record all the instruments himself without losing sound quality, and there had to be a real artist—or at least real musicians.

On top of that, remember that today, a hit song need not even be a song—it can be a rap, or a series of riffs. In 1965, a hit had to have an intro, verse, chorus, verse, chorus, B-section, instrumental break, repeat chorus, fade. The idea that any artist working within such limitations could come up with something original is an achievement in itself. For an artist to not only come up with an original song, but also one that bears dozens of listenings, with new vocal and instrumental nuances surfacing each time—that is truly remarkable.

That's where the beauty of Sixties pop lies, as an analogy for the joy of stability. Every example of it is different, yet it's all tied to a solid structural core. There I was at 16, exulting to the the 12-string guitars of the Beau Brummels' "Just a Little" and the Nina Simone-like vocals of the Zombies' "She's Not There," and I didn't even realize I was a traditionalist.<<<<<

8/1/04: THEY'RE ALWAYS AFTER ME LUCKY CHARMS

No pots o'gold this time...

Would this sentence have made sense 2 years ago?

"Surf different clusters of people, infecting them with your meme."

callalillie.com

7/22/04: EVERYBODY'S GOT ONE

I thought I would show a picture of my family. My cousin Eileen's husband Tom, Eileen, Aunt Mary holding my cousins Brian and Patrick, cousins Tina and Michel (no "-le", please), Michel's daughter Beth, and my Uncle Jimmy. This was when we were cleaning out my father's apartment last summer. I grew up at this building. That's a good-looking bunch...how come I'm related?

7/16/04: MORE OVERNIGHT SENSATIONS

Jon Corbett, who works with me at the world's biggest store, is a comedian by night. Here's his Comedy Central page.

7/13/04: OVERNIGHT SENSATIONS

Just found out that my high school and college pal Gene Eames is a recording artist, as a bassist with Askold Buk. He joins my friends Paul Stingo, now with The Rockinghams (his 1990s band The Peaces' demo was produced by Richard X. Heyman); Steve Graziano, who has produced Certain General and Band of Outsiders in the 1980s and presently helps run Sourmash Records, and Dawn Eden, who appears on Groove Disque's tribute to Stiff Records.

7/12/04: I AM NOT ME

That's a Robyn Hitchcock song title. I wonder if the surreal songwriter has ever had to spend a few hours at the DMV, because I have to go back there to get a new non-driver's ID, since I have apparently lost the one I had made a few months ago. Now I have to scare up 6 pieces of ID that they'll take. After all, I'm not me till the gummint says I'm me.

7/11/04: SORRY NOTHING LATELY

I've always subscribed to the principle, when you have nothing to say, don't say anything (and its corollary: you can put a monkey suit on a monkey, and what you've got is a monkey wearing a monkey suit), and I could fill the space with banal observations, but things have been busy of late and I have a lot of projects on the fire, which will be the case for the next year or so. Any pithy comments will have to wait....until I have any! So much of Forgottenblog resembles the parody columns in The Onion anyway...

6/20/04: WAKE ME UP WHEN IT'S OVER

I've often said I'd like to hibernate between Memorial Day and Labor Day. That said I'd like to wake up for the Mermaid Parade and on weekends like this one when it's 75 degrees and 10% humidity. Can we do that? Thanks.

6/12/04: THE D WORD

The biggest bogey-word among liberals and democrats of late is the "D" word, as in "divisive." Salon.com, the left-wing online newsmagazine, calls Ronald Reagan a "controversial" and "divisive" President, and John Kerry has, during the campaign, pledged to "bring the country together."

This country ain't coming together anytime soon. For the past 4 years, Democrats have reviled W, not only for getting us stuck in Iraq, but for gaining the White House through the Supreme Court. But put the shoe on the other foot, and Gore as president would have been equally disdained and dismissed by the Elephants and the Fox Network. What we have here is an even split between the Reds and the Blues, and the gang colors will be clashing the next 5 months. As far as the blue states are concerned, the red states may as well be a different country, and vice versa.

Kerry, and Bush, for that matter, should stop talking about bringing the country together. They should be saying, vote for me and vote against the other agenda, and we'll come together in a gentler time and sing kumbaya then.

6/11/04: I MISS RONNIE AND MIKE

Time was, your mortal enemy was a kindly-looking grandfather with a port wine stain on his forehead who could be negotiated with, because he ultimately had his own well-being, and those of his countrymen, first and foremost on his mind. That's not true today, when your enemy would rather kill you and himself, if that'll get you killed too. I don't know how Ronnie would have dealt with 9/11. I rather suspect he would have routed the Taliban, but continued to bleed Saddam dry by attrition, with embargoes and no-fly zones.

6/10/04: DON'T ASK ME WHY (cause he don't know)

My hair gets made fun of a lot, because it tends to fly up in the back if there's a wind. In 2004, you're supposed to look like you went to a salon and paid a guy $60 to gel it down with glop and then make it stick up with the glop. But what's media mogul Graydon Carter thinking with that thing on his head that looks like the Flying Nun's headpiece? I'm just imitating Liz Spiers, who mentions Carter all the time and was rewarded with a real column at New York magazine.

6/7/04: CONGRATULATIONS LIGHTNING

It's been 10 years since the Rangers finally did it...how many years till they finally do it again?

6/6/04: TENNIS, NO ONE

I've got nothing against tennis. Really, I don't. Flatbush has one of my favorite streets, Tennis Court. It's an easy game to watch and understand, though how you go from 15-0 to 30-0 to 40-0 baffles me. "Love" is a transliteration of French "l'oeuf" because a zero resembles an egg.

Self-important movie stars and newscasters attend the major events in seats they didn't pay for (like at basketball games) and Wimbledon is suffused with all this arrogance and high-falutinitude. Strawberries and cream and curtseying for the queen. Tennis hasn't been the same since Jimmy Connors and John McEnroe (who annoyed me with their overreactions to calls that went against them) quit. Since then, having no personality at all has been the ideal in tennis.

It's hard to argue for nonelitism with any pro sport these days. It's hard to root for people making obscene amounts of money. I am a class warrior. It would embarrass me to take so much money as they do. If someone pays me a truckload, like A-Rod or J-Lo or Naz or Puff Daddy, to do Forgotten NY, I would take care of my relatives who needed it, take care of some charities and buy a modest apartment or house somewhere. Seinfeld buys a 100-acre mansion in Long Island from Billy Joel.

I read recently that the CEO where I work got a big bonus last year for improving sales, and made $5 million. I had an imaginary conversation with him that goes like this:

"Jeez, ––––––––, I wouldn't know what to do with so much money."

"That's why I made $5 million last year, and you made what you made."

6/3/04: THEY WANT WHAT YOU NEED

According to Margaret Lyons at Chicagoist.com, they're starting up Time Out Chicago. Says editor Chad Schlegel:

“One of the things I need to do is hire a sex columnist and also look for someone to do horoscopes.”

Yeah, just what every other weekly rag in the country has. Does this stuff even get read? I don't want to read about sex, and show me someone who believes that the paths of constellations along the ecliptic determine your fate in the near term, and I'll show you an idiot. Lotsa originality there Chad.

5/30/04: JUST NETFLIX-ED

Bubba Ho-Tep. Bruce Campbell as Elvis in an old-folks home! Ossie Davis thinks he's JFK! They fight evil mummies!

Soundtrack in my head:

"Don't Call Us, We'll Call You" by Sugarloaf, one of 3 hit records in that era to have a Wolfman Jack cameo. The other two: "Clap For The Wolfman", The Guess Who, and "Hit The Road Jack" by The Stampeders. All three acts had been cold of late, so they dialed Dr. Wolfman. "Don't Call Us" is also a blatant ripoff of "I Feel Fine."

5/29/04: GET TOGETHER

I'll scream the next time I hear a candidate say he's going to "bring America together." It's impossible. We live in two countries, Red and Blue, neither of which recognizes the legitimacy of the other. Between '92 and '00, Republicans really didn't acknowledge the legitimacy of the Clinton administration, and from '00 to the present, Democrats have never accepted Bush as president, and they may have a better argument, since it appears Republicans may have tossed some votes out to give W that 500-vote edge in Florida.What the candidates should say is, vote for me and we'll keep the other agenda off the table the next four years as best we can.

I'd also like real debates. As presently constituted, the two or three guys stand in back of lecterns, and the press fires questions. I remember back in the 80s, I watched a debate for Canadian president, and Mulroney and whoever the other guy was were just hammering each other, going at it mano-a-mano. I'd love to see that here...what theater it would be! The one time they got rid of lecterns was in '92. Bush 41 yawned and checked his watch, and after that they put back the lecterns.

5/9/04: ANNOUNCEMENT

I have no desire to travel outside the North American continent, and shall likely never do so.

4/25/04: HERE'S WHERE YOU OUTCOOL ME

This quiz has been meandering around in cyberspace.

1. Grab the nearest book to you, turn to page 18, line 7. Read what it says:

The rooster symbol, "aen een ketel tot de haen van de toorn" (a copper weathercock on the steeple), once

2. Stretch out your left hand as far as you can. What do you touch first?

Thin air

3. What was the last thing you watched on tv?

The Amazing Mets getting no-hit in the 6th inning by Matt Clement. I gave up.

4. Without looking, guess what time it is:

4:25pm

5. Look at the clock. What time is the actual time?

4:41

6. With the exception of the computer, what do you hear?

The computer is playing "Cosmic Slop" a 70s music show streaming from Minneapolis' RadioK.org. Nothing else is making any noise.

7. When did you last step outside? What were you doing?

I was out for a couple of hours earlier today shooting pictures for Forgotten NY.

8. Before you did this survey, what were you looking at?

Answering email.

9. What are you wearing?

A striped blue shirt, pants, etc.

10. Did you dream last night?

Not last night but the dreams have been vivid lately.

11. When did you last laugh?

Yesterday on a walk with Christina.

12. What are on the walls in the room you are in?

I have some framed maps and NYC scenes from long ago. There's also an illuminated picture of a mountain scene that was in my father's apartment for nearly 50 years.

13. See anything weird lately?

Yesterday, in Ridgewood, I saw somebody had nailed a door that was way too small into a space too big for it to swing.

14. What do you think of this quiz?

What's the point?

15. What was the last film you saw?

"Almost Famous" last night, and "Journey to the Seventh Planet" today.

16. If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy first?

I would look for an apartment with 4 rooms or more. You need to be a multimillionaire to afford that.

17. Tell me something about you that I don't know:

There are reasons people don't know.

18. If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do?

I would eliminate the madness that comes over people about religion.

19. Do you like to dance?

Hate it.

20. George W. Bush:

I don't plan to vote for him, but I'm embarrassed over the vitriolic, hateful feelings he has apparently stimulated in people. If you don't like him, don't vote for him.

21. Imagine your first child is a girl.

Egan

22. Imagine your first child is a boy.

My father's name was Kevin, and he named me that; evidently he was looking for a copy of himself, and he was occasionally disappointed. I like Russell, but you also have to give your kid a name he won't be hounded in the schoolyard about. Kids are very strict about not being "different."

23. Would you ever consider living abroad?

They'd have to give me a lot of money.

4/19/04: TODAY'S SOUNDTRACK

"Remember the Future", Nektar, 1974

I remembered the future back then and it wasn't that good. I've been proven right.

4/9/04: VACATION CONFORMITY

With the spring upon us...so they say...we'll soon be regaled with airline companies and travel agencies exhorting us to take a trip someplace. But they're telling me to go places I have no interest in going to.

GOLF. Who in his right mind plays golf? You hit this white ball trying to get it into a hole. You have to go find it after you've hit it, and who knows if the ball you do find is yours or not?

AMUSEMENT PARKS. You mean they want me to strap myself into a device with a hundred other people and ride upside down at 60MPH?

CIRCUSES. I'm supposed to watch people in funny suits berate and whip wild animals, who should really be off in the woods or the jungle eating other animals?

CASINOS. Let me get this straight. Donald Trump, who has a couple of billion dollars, wants me to go to Atlantic City and give him more money?

THE BEACH. Hmmm, that's a good one. You want me to lie in the direct sun and let it burn me?

EUROPE, ASIA, etc. I'm supposed to go to a continent where they despise Americans and don't speak English?

SWIMMING. Last time I looked, I had lungs, not gills, and arms and legs, not fins.

When the airlines air ads showing people picking through abandoned ruins looking for old street signs, sign me up, but till then, their entreaties fall on my deaf ears.

4/8/04: JUST TO HAVE SOME DREAMIN'

The dreams have come thick and fast this week, sometimes 2 vivid ones per night. One night there was this black guy knocking on my door, trying to get in. I knew he was black because I saw him through the peephole. Pleading. He resorted to the race card after awhile trying to make me feel guilty about not admitting him, but I held firm. Then the doorknob started rocking back and forth and I knew he was close to getting in. Then I woke up.

The next night, I'm walking through this semi-apocalyptic landscape. I'm wandering around knowing the next shoe is gonna drop soon and the bomb would go off and I'd be dead.

Last night I was with a Forgotten Fan who I won't name and we're being regaled by stories from a washed up sitcom actress from the 60s who I can't quite place now.

OK, amateur psychoanalysts, fire away!

3/22/04: HEAD SOUNDTRACK

Been playing "A Question of Temperature," a '68 hit by Balloon Farm, in my head all day long. Bet those guys need the royalties and wish I could help 'em out .

Snagged 4000 hits Monday from that NYTimes article...thanks Robert Worth, the author, Cate L. of Prospect Cemetery, Carolyn of King Manor and all Forgotten Fans on the latest tour. 4000 hits is a very good day by FNY standards.

3/19/04: THE DAWN OF CORRECTION

Check out the ever-photogenic Dawn Eden as she leads you through the process of how The Dawn Patrol is produced in her March 19th entry. Though she's in Hoboken, it's made in The Bronx as you will see...

2/29/04: FORGOTTEN'S CHILDREN

Forgotten NY has many inspirations and consequently, has in some small way, inspired many. "Boxing mystery" author Frank Megna researched cobblestones in Forgotten NY for his latest book, "The Long Count."

2/28/04: SHOULDA STOOD IN BED, VOL. LXVIIII

Went to dentist in Bay Ridge. Surprised when he just took an impression and did nothing else. Decided to walk to Bensonhurst to catch the new D service over the Manhattan Bridge. Argued with moronic homeowner in Dyker Heights about taking a photo. Arrived at 79th St. station just in time to miss the train. Waited 10 minutes for another train. Arrived at 34th Street at 1:23, just in time to miss the 1:22 LIRR back to Flushing. Took the subway and bus home instead. Found message on answering machine from dentist's office, saying I didn't have to come in. Later, took train to Manhattan to meet friends to see the Bindlestiff Family Cirkus. Show sold out (friends didn't check). Drank at bar with friends. Went back to Penn Station, boarded train home. Oops, forgot camera at bar. Went back to bar, retrieved camera. Killed time at Penn for an hour. Home at last. And sorry, Steve Serby of the NY Post, that's why they call ME Mr. Loser.

2/14/04: THE ZOMBIES ARE ALIVE

The Zombies in 1964, with Rod Argent (center) and Colin Blunstone (second from right)

The Zombies never had a Top Ten hit in their native England, but that was OK, because as keyboardist Rod Argent noted during their generous 2 1/2-hour show at B.B. King's in Times Square on February 11th, they were usually in the Top 10 someplace in the world in the Swingin' Sixties with one record or another. The new Zombies lineup, which has a brand new record coming out in 2004 (as do The Who) features mainstays Argent and lead vocalist Blunstone, as well as long-time Argent (Rod's 1970s band) and Kinks bassist Jim Rodford, with Rodford's son behind the traps. It's cool to play with your dad in a rock band when that band is one of the greatest groups in history.

Other than the Zombies' three big American hits, "Time of the Season", "Tell Her No" and "She's Not There", the final song before the encore, the Zombies, as I hoped they would, played much of their overlooked 1967 classic album Odessey and Oracle (the album title was unintentionally misspelled at the printer). Odessey and Oracle is part of a group of thematic LPs released by British bands at the time that feature a uniform sound and similar themes throughout, but not a storyline, unlike the more bombastic Tommy. Nonetheless, Odessey and Oracle, like the Kinks' We Are The Village Green Preservation Society or The Who Sell Out, have to be listened to in their entirety in one sitting to be fully appreciated. The Zombies played "Beechwood Park," my favorite song on the LP.

Of course, it's impossible for the group to play Odessey in its entirety because they have so many other classics in their collection like "Indication" and "Just Out of Reach." In the late 1970s Blunstone teamed up with future Eurythmic Dave Stewart for a new arrangement of Jimmy Ruffin's "What Becomes of the Brokenhearted"; my hopes they would do that one were fulfilled, as well as Rod Argent's anthemic "Hold Your Head Up" (with Blunstone on lead for the first time I've heard) and "God Gave Rock and Roll To You." Blunstone sang with a power he doesn't often approach in the studio, though he's at home with more delicate material like Odessey's "A Rose for Emily" and his own "Misty Roses." He surprised me with one song I knew only from Denny Laine's version, "Say You Don't Mind." Argent and Blunstone, each pushing 60, were enthusiastic performers and raconteurs.

I was accompanied by Dawn, who squealed with delight anytime anything from Odessey was struck up (Dawn wrote the liner notes for the Rhino reissue of Argent's All Together Now), and Carolyn of Rutherford, who endeared herself immediately by professing her enthusiasm for The Who Sell Out, the Soft Boys, and the Hoboken train station. After the show, Dawn offered an introduction to Rod as well as Richard X. and Nancy Heyman, who were in attendance, but I wasn't prepared and would have had nothing to offer but fanboy blather, so I reluctantly passed. Great night, regardless.

2/7/04: SPAM POETRY

I am often accused of being prosaic. Unimaginative. Pedestrian. A oaf, as Mary Beth says.

But I am sensitive. I am a poet.

And here is the proof.

I have created poetry out of the titles of spam emails that are sent to me from around the world.

Eat your heart out, Van Dyke Parks and Allen Ginsberg.

Humility, Johnny!
Ostensibly Permian Bristol
Cornish Nero
Mickey, frolic in excrescent chicanery,
Embroidery angler, flautist even,
For Cretaceous Elsinore.

Chalcedony, Crowley!
Confect, falsify attributives:
"Alfonso O'Connor in Acapulco"
Berserk curricula
Dirge dearth Australia, cogitate, rip!
Refutation... blithe Compton, Bragg-crafty.

Decode, bloke!
Minuet bittern Antarctica oratorio
Dominique delicious
Certify, calf doorknob catbird
Froze confrontation, chap immoral
Fluent inboard featherbedding rostrum

2/2/04: ARRRGHHHHH! (COUGH)

My friend Dawn and I were going to Union Pacific today to get Rocco's cuisine at Restaurant Week prices, but both she and I are sick with nasty colds, so we cancelled. I still have to fill in at work tonight, so it's White Castle for your webmaster.

A Forgotten NY photo will appear on a spring issue of American Airlines' Attache Magazine.

I spoke to Ben McGrath of The New Yorker for an article about City Lights, NYC's new lamppost competition.

1/30/04: WHEN YOU PUT YOURSELF OUT THERE

Forgotten Fans Vinny Losinno and long-time hockey announcer and subway maven Stan Fischler recently accompanied Your Webmaster on a frigid night to a West Side restaurant where the talk turned to the Rangers' and the IRT's perennial misfortunes. Stan has written hundreds of sports and subway books.

Forgotten Fan and teammate at the World's Biggest Store John Corbett recently turned up as a Santa impersonator (John's on the right) on Colin Quinn's Comedy Central show Tough Crowd. John is a standup comic at various venues around town.

1/16/04: LETTERBOX LUNACY

Most DVDs in current release...and even some TV broadcasts... employ a widescreen ratio or letterbox format, meaning that the entire width of the screen as the diretcor shot it is shown in its entirety, but at the cost of making the picture really small with two thick black bars at the top.

I say scrap it. If you want to see the whole picture, do it in the theater, where the screens are wider. When I'm looking at TV, I don't want to have to pull the chair up closer to the set to see the dang thing. Yes, I know wide screen HDTV is here. Not for me until the price comes down to affordability, like $150 or so.

I want the picture to fill the screen!

I'm lovin' it. The cold, I mean. In August, when I'm sitting here making Forgotten NY in a 90-degree apartment and the sweat is rolling down my back (your webmaster does not have central air) I daydream about January with a fresh coat of white snow, a howling wind and a diamond-hard blue sky, just like yesterday.

However: my observations indicate that more sociable people prefer heat, while loners prefer cold. Works out in my case.

1/4/04: BAND-AID

I was surprised and saddened to hear that one of my favorite songwriters, Alejandro Escovedo, has hepatitis C, without health insurance. Here's a fund that has been set up to help him out.

1/3/04: WHAT THE F@#% DO I KNOW VOL. 66

Many reports suggest that laptop computers are swiftly outpacing desktop models. Beats me why. I don't want to always have to recharge a computer or use batteries...to have them burn out. I want to plug it in and have continuous power, forever. The guy next to me on the train back from Washington, when he wasn't yammering loudly into his cell phone, was watching Seabiscuit on his laptop and he had to thread a cable to the outlet...across my knee. If I wanted to get up, I would have had to climb over it. Progress, bub.

1/2/04: NICE START

The new year has been active so far. Spent January 1 inspecting historic buildings in western Staten Island and January 2 tooling around Huntington with Nigey and Eric, visiting Walt Whitman's birthplace; the ca. 1812 building still stands.

12/30/03: RING ME WHEN IT'S OVER

Spent a few days in Washington DC. Visited an aunt, saw the monuments, hit a couple of museums. Trip was OK, I guess. But the train ride down and back was cell phone hell.

What bothers me is that why didn't they ask me if I wanted my peace and quiet interrupted by all these people yakking about nothing at all? Why can't they just wait till they get to the station to talk, like I do? Why do they need to be talking loudly all the time?

I suppose I will have to pay extra to ride in the quiet car...which insults me, since every car used to be a quiet car...or buy earplugs. It's a crime. I want to take all these cell phones and drop them into the sea.

12/26/03: THE GREATEST ONE

Q Magazine (published in Britain) has selected U2's "One" as the #1 rock song in history. "One," get it?

It's OK...one of their better 'ones' in fact...but everyone knows the greatest song ever made was

"Pledging My Love" by Johnny Ace. They'll play that one if I ever get married.

12/25/03: MERRY CHRISTMAS

Just like I did last year, I'll do a brief review of my favorite Christmas music...

--I find most Christmas music treacly beyond imagining. This year, a lot of radio stations started pounding the Yule drums early...a trend that is, I fear, to be permanent...and of course they stuck to the overcaloric, sugary stuff as usual. Laid on with a trowel were the Carpenters (though Karen Carpenter's voice was a work of art, Richard's Christmas arrangements are textbook examples of blandness); if I have to hear Brenda Lee's "Rockin' Around The Christmas Tree" again, I'm going to have to start chopping them down; and "Jingle Bell Rock" stopped rocking eons ago. Here's what I would do if they let me loose with 50,000 watts of power.

--"Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas" is one of my favorite Christmas songs because of its hint of melancholy. I've heard it by a lot of artists but nobody does it like Chrissie Hynde.

--My "Christmas in Ireland" LP by The Little Dublin Singers has earned the clicks, scratches and pops that only albums played over and over and over again earn. It was recorded by an amateur group of 8 to 13 year old Irish girls in the late 1960s with the aid of a sole organist and baritone Michael O'Connell and features 15 well- and little-known Christmas songs sung in both English and Irish. If "Christmas in Kerry" doesn't momentarily dispel the holiday blues nothing will.

--Sure, they play the Waitresses' "Christmas Rapping" way too much...it's become the A Christmas Story of holiday radio songs...but it's probably the second rap record to be a hit on the radio, after Blondie's "Rapture." A brief look into the Waitresses' career will reveal the talents of Chris Butler, who also recorded the longest pop song ever attempted, "Devil Glitch" which is 69 minutes long. When you hear "Christmas Rapping", remember that we lost singer Patty Donahue way too early a few years ago when she succumbed to cancer at age 40.

	Bing 'N David's "Peace on Earth/"Little Drummer Boy" has gotten the overplay treatment but think of how strange it was, back in 1977, to see the Thin White Duke duetting with The Old Groaner on Bing's final annual Christmas special (he had passed away that September). Bowie had been a longstanding Bing fan. Bing told an interviewer that he considered Bowie "a clean cut kid and a real fine asset to the show. He sings well, has a great voice and reads lines well. He could be a good actor if he wanted." Bing died just a month later...

--Don't forget Santo and Johnny's "Twistin' Bells"; Barry Richards' "Baby Sittin' Santa" (a takeoff on the Buzz Clifford classic "Baby Sittin' Boogie"); the Turtles' "Santa and the Sidewalk Surfer"; "Run Run Rudolph" was great by Chuck Berry and almost as good by Dave Edmunds; Greg Lake's Prokofievian "I Believe in Father Christmas" takes a cynical look at the holiday, matching my own outlook at times; normally I'm not the biggest fan of Phil Spector's wall of sound antics but the Crystals' "Parade of the Wooden Soldiers" is a favorite; I like either version of "Listen, The Snow is Falling" by Yoko Ono or the later one by Galaxie 500; I like "On Comet" by The Point... I'm not sure if they were one of those early-80s LA "paisley pop" bands (like The 3 O'Clock or Dream Syndicate) but they sound like it. The Beatles, in every year from 1963-1969, put out a special Christmas record exclusively for their fan club, and to this day, they are rarely heard, which is a shame; the records were made enthusiastically and weren't just contract obligations.

--Lastly it doesn't get better than The King's "Blue Christmas" and if you can't have that, you can have "Santa Claus is Back in Town."

12/23/03. TIME FOR ANOTHER
Since Forgottenblog has been such an overwhelming failure, I'm gonna do it for another year.

LL COOL KEV: Ladies, like Publishers Clearing House art director Gerry G, love Your Webmaster. Note the ever-present strap which carries the camera case. Photo: Diane Bonder.

My father had an eclectic taste in music, and as this mailing list for one of his tape clubs proves, he had excellent taste in music, as well. Irish, Scottish and world music were #1 on his list, but he also had a healthy appreication for mid-Sixties country. I've become a Hank Snow fan in recent months so there's hope for his shiftless son yet.

FORGOTTENBLOG: YEAR ONE